It's Monday, so that means it is time for Friend Makin' Monday! A fun way to meet other bloggers out there. Check out Kasey's blog for the rules. Today, Kasey asked us to share the best advice we have received.
I am sure if I sat and thought about all of the advice I have received over the years, I could come up with many. But the first one that came to mind is from someone I used to work with. When I was about to get married back in 1999 (so long ago!), my colleague Linda told me this: When I am married and have kids, make it a point to have a date night with Jason AT LEAST once a month, or more. AND, we could not talk about the kids. At the time, not having kids, I thought that seemed like an easy task. Boy was I wrong when we did have kids!
I was almost 24 when I got married, which seems so young now that I look back. Jason was 26. We had Samantha after being married for 3 1/2 years. After she came along, I was able to see and understand what Linda meant. It is so easy to have our children be the center of our life, which is fine and expected, but we have a marriage that is like a garden. It needs to be watered, fertilized, and weeded. It cannot be ignored or it will slowly die and the weeds will overtake the garden. When Julie lived in TX, we had it set on the calendar with her and my mother-in-law to watch each other's kids. Julie had my kids the first weekend of each month (we could pick Fri or Sat), she had my kids the 3rd weekend of every month, and my mother-in-law had all of our kids the last weekend of the month. AND, we had the kids overnight. So we were guaranteed 2 date nights a month. It was great! Some nights we went out with friends, some we made elaborate plans for just us, sometimes it was just dinner and then back home. Since we had so many nights to just us, we got creative and came up with all kinds of things we never did. Once we played Bingo. Even though I walked out smelling like I smoked cigarettes all night (I don't smoke, those places are so smoky!), I came out winning $750! Not kidding, I won that much on my first try. Movies, bowling, sports bars to play trivia, coffee houses...we tried all kinds of things. It was great and got us to reconnect as a couple.
Now that Julie doesn't live in TX, we have had to really make it a point to go out. Luckily, all of our parents live within a 1 hr radius from us, so we have them to watch our kids or a few set dear friends that we trust. If you don't have family near you, reach out to find a good trusted babysitter to pay. I know, that cuts into budgets, but for the sake of your marriage, it is worth it! Add it to the family budget. You and your husband will thank me for it!
On another note, I will try to post pictures from our great weekend at my mom's for Easter. I was sick the entire time with horrible sinus headaches and allergies. I even missed church! That is how horrible I felt, missing church on Easter Sunday of all days! Check back tomorrow for that post.
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